You know the strange object that now stands in Cheonggyecheon? The one commissioned to an artist who had visited Korea once in 1996 and made that kinda random-looking plum-and-vanilla ice cream cone thingie? Here's the logic the Seoul city government apparently used (from the Korea Times):
"We expect that the sculpture by the famous artist will enhance the international status of Chonggyechon stream and increase the number of foreign visitors to Seoul,’’ [said city representative.]
When will The Korean Suits learn that no Western tourist will ever give two craps more about Korea because some "famous artist" made some random piece.
No one will every buy more plane tickets and come traveling to see a Technicolor™ snail (well, if it's the Cirque du Soleil snail, maybe). It will not "enhance the international status of the Cheonggyecheon stream" because streams don't have international statuses, foo'!
It's a stream. It's not a waterfall, raging rapids, or tropical paradise. And it's an artificial stream. It's cool enough and looks nice; you can take a date there or drink some makkoli under a bridge. It's a legendary case to Urban Studies wonks and the city deserves some kudos for trying to put some nature back into the nurture.
But art decisions should be left to artists, not ajussis in suits. Because if there's one thing ajussis in suit know nothing about, it's foreigners and what's floating around their heads.
Ajussis in suits who run Arirang TV, Seoul Magazine, and other pappy brochures for tourists, take note: Foreigners who have lived here longer than a month don't need to be constantly reminded of the "charms of Insadong" or "the beauty of Kyongbuk Palace" or "the wonders of the Yongin Folk Village."
Similarly, no foreigners are going to get on a plane because of even Korea's and oldest palaces – sheesh, I'd go to China for royal shit in red – let alone a strangely phallic, post-modern snail in the middle of a downtown. There are no "international statuses" here being affected by giant ice-cream cone snails.
Seoul City Government – want to raise Korea's "international status?" Here's a list of far more effective things to do:
– Allow foreigners to buy cellphones. Come on! "Hub of Asia?" Please. Korea wants to be a hub, and you can't even get a cellie in your own name? Whatever!
– Make a public awareness campaign to stop people from verbally and physically harassing foreigners in public. Remember that embarrassing "Smile at foreigners" campaign just before the 2002 World Cup? Well, this is something like that, but less stupid.
– Regulate the hagwon system and create a real mechanism to enforce contract violations against foreign teachers working here as employees.
Anyway, enough griping. This is not even as ridiculous as the City Government talking about "redeveloping" Insadong by building shopping malls there.
Or take the city's ongoing destruction of historic (and tasty) Pimatgol – the alleyway parallel to Jongno that runs from the Kyobo Bookstore to...well...used to run all the way down to nearly Tapkol Park – when I went into the huge "model house" on the site where they're building a huge apartment building now, the representative actually had the nerve to tell me that "Pimatgol isn't being destroyed, but is going to be preserved as an underground food court alley."
Jiggawhat?
Just say it's being destroyed and we're "moving on" – don't try to tell me that it's being "preserved" by being turned into a Coex-type, glass-and-steel strip with a neon sign that says "Pimatgol" under the street that the real one – with it's fish roasting on the street and old ladies stirring odiferous pots of cheongukjang – used to be.
Grr. Anyway, it's not like anyone will remember.
This is the same city that wanted to remove all the street stalls in the city during the World Cup 2002 because foreigners would "think Korea was dirty." Idiots.
These are the same idiots who actually spent money on that "Smile Korea" campaign – "Smile for the white man, yes!" – or put the President of the Republic into a tourist commercial, where he got to embarrass himself by shilling for tourists.
Who is thinking all this stuff up? Someone needs to find him and put him out to pasture, because he's doing more to make Korea look like a desperate-for-dollars-and-recognition nation with an inferiority complex than anything else.
Wait – or is that actually an inaccurate assessment?
Hmm.
