Scribblings of the Metropolitician

Podcast #29 - Hooters in Seoul

Join Michael and friend Unju as they visit Korea's first Hooters restaurant, which opened this January in Seoul. We check the place out, have a couple of beers, and interview American Hooters trainer Sara, along with Korean waitress Cindy. Get the inside story on the goings on there, straight from the people who know it best. (Click here to subscribe to the podcast in iTunes.)

Running Time: 41:57
File Size: 28.8 MB
File Info: 96 kbps (mono) at 44.1 kHz, MPEG-2, layer 3 (MP3)

I decided to meet a private challenge of seeing what kind of shots I could get if I took my camera and my photo-critical butt down to the restaurant myself, since my post dissing some of the newspaper shots of the Korean press, all while putting down a first podcast with my 대학후배 friend Unju. She has quite a radio-friendly voice, doesn't she? I think I partially accomplished my goal, although the white balance on my camera was going crazy. We're not working with film anymore, Dorothy.

Here's a shot of Sara that I liked. She looks quite the busy bee, although I wish she had come out sharper. But I love the moment.

Sara in action, doing a mini-dance in tandem with the other girls.

Making the atmosphere much more fun the you'd get in a TGIF. Hmm – I thought about which is weirder or more "humiliating" – being required to dress up like Olivia Newton-John in "Physical" or wear a bunny hat, neon socks, 47 "pieces of flair," and a nearly equally-short skirt? I feel more comfortable, to my surprise, in the Hooters.

This was my first time to a Hooters, and I was somewhat skeptical about its prospects in a Korea full of women doing all kinds of serving and services attached to food, drink, and song. But I still reserved some room for the opposite opinion, because of the highly gendered way the "family restaurant" plays out in Korea, i.e. it's a place where women go.

As a clean alternative to that, it kind of makes sense that this might be just about the only American-style, real sports bar kind of place that might just be sustained by a diverse customer base sick of forced and burdensome "good" service, and the somewhat surly reception one gets from similar sports bars already in Korea.

The American trainer staff was definitely full of infective smiles, which they succeeded in passing on to the Korean staff to a large extent. I could still feel a difference between them, but then again, it was a big difference from the generally robotic service one gets in almost any service relationship in Korea.

Perhaps I am just looking at this through rose-colored lens filters, but the atmosphere was awfully homey.

The food was ok, and I did get my real hot dog that I wanted, but it almost seemed like the fare was mostly an excuse to call it a restaurant and have some beers – American-style anju, as it were.

Of course, I didn't order their main attraction – chicken wings – so I need to go back again to...ahem...evaluate them. See, this is all about work. Gotta be thorough, you know.

I wish I had gotten a good shot of the order in motion with the right pose, as well as the facial expression. I took several shots, and in the one perfect one that had all three elements just right, the server had closed her eyes. Doh! The shot above was the best of the batch. Dangit!

As we were wrapping up our bill, I caught snippets of conversation and it was apparent that it was the blonde trainer's last night, a fact that seemed to sort of sneak up on the crew as she prepared to make her exit.

I saw that the staff had become quite close over the 3 weeks they had trained together, as quite a few tears were shed on both sides.

Koreans aren't really big on hugging, but I sure saw a lot of sincere red-facing and hearty embracing. But I don't get verklempt; I'm a photographer, dammit.

OK – maybe a little. Strangely enough, I had quite a strong feeling of going to "a place where nobody has to ask your name." Sounds corny, but I felt much more like I had gone to the comfortable neighborhood bar that I don't get here in Korea, with its emphasis on glitz and self-conscious ostentatiousness when it comes to places of food and drink that a 35 year-old man would want to go with his buds.

Perhaps that's why I avoid Kangnam like the plague, at least when it comes to socializing. Korean American expats seem to love it, as do people who prefer the LA-style nightlife of shiny black cars, girl with coats that cost more than a month of my rent, or cocktails that cost $12 made by a bartender as smoking hot as she is a really bad bartender.

Hey – I come from the American Midwest, where people people drive big cars, eat large portions, and have relatively simple tastes without pretension. I hated LA during the one time I went there, and I could barely adjust to San Francisco.

Somehow, I found the trip to Hooters simply...refreshing, to my surprise. It's not only an oasis of self-conscious American kitsch in ostentatious below-the-river Seoul, it was the closest thing I've had to middle American-style, unapogetically gauche pleasures in a long time.

In America, Hooters always seemed a bit too much for the fratty, party-hardy, boys-who-will-be-boys crowd; but in Korea, it was, at least for me, something different, because of its different context. Back home, Hooters was nothing special, nothing I'd make a detour for; but here, it felt like a little piece of true Americana that was really different from the "American-style" restaurants here that have become so Koreanized.

It gave new meaning to their t-shirt slogan "delightfully tacky yet unrefined." Well put. I – and Seoul – could use some more of that.

Korea's First Video Podcast!

It's been a long time in the making, the bane of my existence, but yet its raison. I purposely turned down full-time work from the summer on and subsisted on the most ramen I've eaten since college. yet my waistline has expanded from countless hours sitting in front of the computer. I'm nearly 35 and veritably circled the drain of financial insolvency to set thing up to push this baby out, as well as line up other aspects of the project.

And the time has come to let my "Seoooooul glow!!!!!"

You'll see what I mean. Do kindly watch the video below and bookmark SeoulGlow.com, and leave comments about the video itself over there.

The goal here is to get a different kind of voice out there, to set a better example through action and not mere words, and to make a difference if we can.

New episode every Tuesday. And we want your feedback, show ideas, and actual video submissions on the site.

Do tell all your friends about it, blog it, put the YouTube video on your site, and link back to SeoulGlow.com.

Let's build a base to do cool things, people. This single episode and even video podcast is but a tip of the iceberg.

And don't forget to "let your Seooooooooooooul glow!"

To the Korean Weatherman

Is it me, or is the accuracy of Korean weather prediction pretty much near the same rate as random chance? I mean, before the weekend, I was getting weather warnings from KTF, people were telling me that my internal organs were going to freeze solid unless I wore 3 layers of naebok, and that I had better sequester myself at home lest I catch sudden pneumonia and die a horrible death, hacking chunks of my lungs out into empty, instant ramen cups alone in my officetel.

Generally, I think Korean people vocalize way too much about how hot or cold they are – earlier in my days of learning Korean, a woman got on an elevator and was repeating very loudly that it was "so cold, so cold," to which I responded that "yeah, it is, isn't it?" She looked at me like I was the crazy one, although I still think, at least I'm not talking to myself in an elevator.

Anyway, this message goes out to all the Korean meteorologists who can't seem to be even in the range of 50% as to whether it will rain, sleet, or hail on any given day, let alone several in advance.

"You gots to chill."

Yes, it's a ham-handed segue into the random piece of retro pop culture I am going to throw your way today, but I thought it would be intemperate of me not to offer it. Guffaw, guffaw. You'll have to forgive me that piece of punnery, please.

IN 1986/7, EPMD – short for "Erick and Parrish Making Dollars" – released the "freshest" rap song that wouldn't be played on MTV (that network had still not decided that rap was music yet, so, to all you boys and girls who remember, rap didn't make it into the definition of "music" until DJ Jazzy Jeff's "Parents Just Don't Understand" absolutely forced them to let black people onto the until-then mostly white airwaves, which effectively killed BET's "Rap City", but I digress) until a couple years later.

I be the personal computer, information on rap
Like the B-I-Z Markie says, I'll make your toes tap
I format the rhymes step by step
Make 'em sound def to maintain my rep
Prepared to come off in case of a diss
Not worried about a thing, cos we can do this
I can turn the party out just by standin' still
Make the ladies scream and shout while the brothers act ill
Take total control of your body and soul
Pack a nine in my pants for when it's time to roll...

Ah...the 80's. EPMD defined the prime time, in my humble estimation, of rap's reign: right before it went commercial, having developed itself past the point of predictable simplicity, but before it developed into the many major strains of commercialism and self-serving narcissism one can see today.

It was also the last days of free sampling, when people without a huge record label's studio could afford to sample the classic hooks of the greats who came before them. That's why only "P. Diddy" or Dr. Dre can afford to manufacture the sweet beats and musical hooks today, while those without are simply left to stay very illegally underground, or come up only through commercial channels, which are, to say the least, artistically limiting.

To say sampling was stealing was a stretch, since everyone knew where what was coming from, and the fun in the game was reusing the parts the most creatively to construct new musical structures.

Anyway, that's the intellectualized way of saying that sampling made rap great, and literally the freshest musical form American culture had seen in a long time, in literally and lyrically constructing a genre from the leftover detritus of other ones – rock, blues, jazz, and even classical.

Two turntables and a mixer later, you had the deffest post-modern pastiche your ass could ever shake to. Word.

More EPMD:

Catch every word I'm sayin', no there's no delayin'
Don't hestitate to motivate the crowd, I'm not playin'
Seeing is believing, you catch my drift?
Don't try to adapt because I'm just too swift
(How swift?) I'm so swift and that's an actual fact
I'm like Zorro, I mark a E on your back
I don't swing on no ropes or no iron cords
The only weapon is my rappin' sword...

Niiice. And yes, I most certainly did learn those most basic, funky, yet comical moves that guy in the yellow was doing, although I only got to see this particular video twice. Twice, dude.

On a side note, given the generally corny state of videos back in nearly the mid-1980's, the "You Gots to Chill" production was very well done. I mean, it prefaced the late-1990's obsession with super-close-Madonna/Beyonce cam, mirrored by the nearly macro model photography made popular with the reuse of the ringflashes and strobes. That split-screen effect, with the evenly-lit face of one of the pair rapping while the other or someone else danced in the background was surprisingly fresh back in the day, which is one of the reasons that video, which I barely ever saw, stuck out in my head.

The style of the video itself was indeed "chill," and not BellBivDevoe bombastic; I liked the effect of having them rap in a cold room with the condensation from their breath emphasizing the chilly point of the song, punctuated by some kitschy shots of 50's-era refrigerator commercials. Chilly chill.

And through the magic of YouTube, I can now run most of the video on a loop and practice the dance moves again. Seriously, EMPD and many, many other great groups out there from back in the day – you need to get some cheap DVD compilations of your videos out pronto.

Or put 'em on iTunes. I'd buy each and every one of the Fat Boys, EPMD, and N.W.A. videos, none of which I really got to see much play of besides when I happened to catch a particular song on BET (Black Entertainment Television, for those of you who didn't catch it above).

By the time MTV got around to letting rap videos on, the heydey of many of the great rap videos was gone.

So we have a mini "black hole" – ahem – in the visibility of many of rap's greatest rap videos. Indeed, who can argue that the world doesn't need to take heed of this poignant message?

Intimidate MC's with the tone of my vocal drone
When I'm pushin' on the microphone
Cos I'm the funky rhyme maker, MC undertaker
The one who likes to max and relax
And, when it's time, issue diggum-smacks
I keep their hands clappin', fingers snappin', feet tappin'
When it's time to roll Uzi patrol's packin'
The Pee MD, the mic's my only friend
And through the course of the party I kill again and again
So if you're thinkin' 'bout battlin' you better come prepared
Come wit' your shield and your armoured gear
You gots to chill...

Back when violent lyrics were mere metaphor, and nobody was really rollin' with Uzis, other than the lyrical kind, of course.

Send Erick and Parrish, the "green-eyed bandit," to some Six-Party Talks. We don't need to regulate with force, or the threat thereof; shouldn't the nations of the world simply suffice with issuing verbal "diggum smacks" on a stage everyone can see?

We'd rap North Korea's ass off. South Korea would give the US a serious run for its money in the breakdancing arena, however, since we haven't been developing that face-off technology very much since the 1980's.

On Suicide in Korea

The recent issue of suicide here in Korea is one where an outside perspective might be helpful. It's a touchy issue – as it is anywhere – and fraught with pain, anger, and embarrassment. But not talking about it and not facing it directly just makes the pain worse.

The recent suicide of pop star U-Nee and the typical ranting of the posturing, moralizing, and oversimplifying done written by the out-of-touch conservatives at the Korea Times and other mainstream newspapers in their editorials is typical of the general Korean attitude I have observed about suicide here: point the finger where it is the easiest, while keeping silent when is socially uncomfortable.

U-Nee didn't leave a suicide note, nor is there any other evidence to point to the reasons that singer made the tragic choice to take her own life besides the assumptions of people who haven't a clue about the inner workings of her psyche.

Using this simplistic and unfounded "logic," then the elementary school student who killed himself because Mommy yelled at him for watching TV, or the teenagers who kill themselves over $1000 bucks in credit card debt, or another elementary school student who was scolded for buying too many clothes for her avatars online – these cases should be the beginnings of campaigns against the "national disgrace" of scolding kids for watching TV, letting them use credit cards, or buying clothes for avatars online.

Clearly, what I am trying to say here is that there are a lot of cases of people who might have been crying out for help in other ways, who obviously had deep-seated depression or stress with which they could not cope, but the media simply chooses to choose the easy explanation, often the straw that broke the camel's back rather than the psychologically huge burdens that strained it in the first place.

And on the flipside, when the causes are as clear as day – which is most often the case for the many youth who kill themselves because of unimaginable pressure related to school ("my mother beats me if I don't get a perfect score" is something my students used to tell me matter-of-factly, as if they had just told me that the weather's cold outside), mum's the word.

Oh, newspapers and the media crow about student suicide for awhile and nothing changes. But the real crime – in the places where it affects students the most – is in the schools themselves.

If a student commits suicide in Korea, it's business as usual in the school. No memorial services, no speeches by the administrators, no grief counselors, no day of mourning – nada.

In fact, many schools actively ban any talk of the student's actions at atl, as if it's a big secret that no one knows about. This true cruelty and cowardice on the part of the adults who should be setting examples for students – they are educators, right? – drives home more deeply the message that only the desperate, diseased, and dysfunctional can't handle the system, so they are better left ignored, forgotten, and even despised.

It's hard to look at the increasing evidence that the education system is in itself an inhumane one, not at all concerned with the psychological and mental development of its students. Yes, more attention is being given to counseling in Korean schools these days – I know that more teachers are getting certifications to be called one, but I wonder if this isn't just more window dressing for the public rather than a change in strategy of dealing with youth mental health – but this is like applying a bandaid to an stomach wound spewing arterial blood.

I personally know, from a session at a Fulbright ETA workshop, that in a single year of our group of about 60 American teachers' experience working in the Korean public schools, 3 had cases with a student suicide. In those cases, the school forbade any gatherings, and one even made an announcement that forbade any talk of the incident, both inside the school and on the Internet. Nevertheless, some students had organized a boycott of the school for a day. Good for them.

Just a few weeks ago, a Korean teacher friend of mine said that a student had killed himself in her school, and the most the school did was – ahem, nothing – but the students put flowers in his empty seat.

So a student takes a flying leap off the building because of academic pressures, after many warning signs and bouts of severe depression and the typical pattern of withdrawing from family, friends, and refusing to do schoolwork, or jumping off a building after failing a major examination – and the next day at school, it's "turn in your homework, clean up your desks, and have a nice day"?

In the meat-grinder that is the Korean schools, when kids are offing themselves for obvious reasons, society does nothing, changes nothing – it's business as usual.

When a public figure commits suicide, the most superficial and least likely reasons explain all – netizen harrassment? Come on.

Think about U-Nee. Much of her harassment came from harsh quips about her endless series of plastic surgeries. Hmm. Sure, those barbs probably hurt, but does anyone stop to think about her psychological state, in that she had many more operations than even is expected for the most vain of Korean public figures?

I hear this so often – "She was so pretty! I don't understand. What a waste."

Well, she obviously didn't think so, or so one might reasonably assume, if we are going to sit in our armchairs and conjecture about it. At least we know that she was apparently never satisfied with her appearance enough that even the general public, used to as it is to plastic surgery as a part of the industry, was always surprised by the number of procedures she went through.

Or maybe the pressures of getting ahead in the dirty business that is Korean showbiz, or being a public figure in general? How about the possibility that something else, much deeper was going on? How is an editorial going to start ranting and raving about Korean netizens – who are the last people on earth for whom I have any form of sympathy, as my readers should know – doing what they do best, which is needle, barb, and mercilessly attack? That's a constant, not some unusual factor particular to the case of U-Nee, no matter how many comments she got about her "artificial human" appearance.

What really makes me suspicious is the sudden concern and caring right-wing newspapers have for a plastic, bubble-gum, K-pop star. And the sudden boost to the cause of having all Korean citizens being registered and traceable online, now being trumpeted with even more vigor across the boob tube, raises my hackles as well as my eyebrows.

I hate the rabid viciousness of many Korean netizens as much as the next digital dude, but the 1984-style management of this issue and the Korean Internet is pretty disturbing, almost as much as the apparent moral indignation over the individual lives of those who have committed suicide seems hollow and false.

Ghetto Banking™, Korean Style

You know you have sunk to new lows of Ghetto Banking™ when you have 10,700 won in your account and you want to take out 10,000, but the remaining 700 won wouldn't be enough to cover the transaction fees; so you transfer 1500 won from your other account (which has a grand total of 4500 won or so, also too little to withdraw from) to that one and then withdraw the 10,000 bill.

After that, you take a cab.

Ah, the power of the instantaneous transfer. Those are Korean banking skills to pay the bills, people.

"Smooth Operator"

Sade. The 80's. The beginning of over-ambitious video editing. The "music video."

It all adds up to fun when it comes to cool as ice Sade, who is, as Eddie Murphy once pointed out, I believe, the one star who is megafamous yet you probably wouldn't think to look at her twice – umm, besides the fact that she's gorgeous – in a grocery store checkout line.

Anyway, here's a priceless video I just found while YouTubing, which I want to use to kick off a new category here on the blog, called Randomatron™, which gives me a category to do what I do sometimes anyway, which is post random bits about pop culture that are just as likely as not to be related to Korea.

In this extended, video, watch for the gun chase at the end.

Priceless. I hope this makes your Friday morning a little brighter, though. Who doesn't love Sade? Her music is just as cool now as the...the...80's. Who can pull that off? Nu Shooz? Taylor Dane? The Jets? Lisa Lisa? Twisted Sister?

Only Sade, baby.

Paula Abdul Is Lit!

Wow – like watching a train crash in show motion, Paula Abdul was lickity lit on television. I don't know the background on this, but man – who knew? Watch 'em while you can, because Fox is trying to get all 1984 on these videos.

Damn, Paula! Somebody call her a cab!

But on another note, this whole thing is bringing up some interesting legal issues. Taken from the link above, the crux of it is:

Any violation of what is known as the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA) is grounds for removal of videos on YouTube, a division of Mountain View, California-based search giant Google. However, there are also “fair use” laws that allow some content—such as short clips or satirical depictions of celebrities—to be aired online.

DMCA vs. "fair use." Whichever way it goes, I do know one thing – Paula, girl, you hafta pull it together! Whew.

"Forced"

I'll leave the captioning and commentary out for once, and listen to your responses on this one, colored only by the title as it described my reaction to this shot when I first checked it after dumping it off my card.

Why Is This Illegal, Again?

Speaking of naked parties...

Thanks for the link, Mark. And I think I may just end up taking up your podcast suggestion.

And I do remember this link from a couple years back, but didn't think much of it. Now that I've not only had to prepare myself to deal with potentially stupid misinterpretations of the law, but have been on the receiving end of it being broken (as it relates to photography), I really wonder about the ability of the Korean police to enforce anything fairly, in terms of the laws on the books.

So why were these people busted again? What laws did they break? According to the story – see, Korea Herald, leaving your stories up actually BENEFITS your paper (kudos, English Chosun) – the police busted up a whole bunch of swingers identified through a swingers web site.

Busan police detained on Tuesday a 37-year-old man identified as Yu for founding and operating the website and arranging for what police described as "abnormal" sexual relations between the community's members.

Now, maybe it's the paper's problem and the result of misreporting, but are "abnormal" sexual relations actually illegal? Now, arranging the site may have been illegal according to Korean law, but where does one's sexuality come in? It's mentioned that the police admit they're on "shaky ground."

However, police admit to being on shaky ground. They say while swinging may be detrimental to public morality, it is a consensual activity and there are no legal grounds for punishing it.

Yeah, you think? What's chilling is the fact that they even assert they're "on shaky ground." If there are "no legal grounds" that strikes me as different than "shaky ground," don't you think? So what are they investigating all the other members of the group for?

Call me a wannabe lawyer, but if Internet porn is illegal, the only people who could get into trouble would be this guy Yu and anyone else who clearly violated Korean obscenity law, which I understand to be anyone depicting sexual copulation or showing genitalia. "Hooters," as it were, are legal. Penises, however, are not.

But just being a member of the group shouldn't actually be illegal. Go make a swinging group – just don't put naughty pictures online! But I'd assume you could just put up profile pics, though.

Hey, but it's the Busan police. They seem to interpret the law according to whatever floats their boat in the needed direction. They'll find something to bust you for, and if they can't, they'll make you take a pee test!

Yeah, Baby, YEAH!

Naked parties. Brown U. This is soooo 1990's.

New York Times, where ya been, baby?!

Yale, schmale. Brown invented "The Naked Party" back in the 80's, yeah, and it was already old news when I nervously went to Watermyn House (ahem, it was "Waterman" back then) with a printed invitation and a 30% chance of chickening out in 1993.

Watermyn House, a living cooperative near the Brown campus that houses about 15 students, throws a naked party every fall. Typically, about 100 people show up, most of them having received printed invitations (in 2004, the note featured a sketch of Adam and Eve being banished from Eden). Sheets are hung in front of the windows, and students deposit their clothes in garbage bags. Many don creative accessories: scarves, leg warmers, hats, belts, sashes, bunny ears. Last year, a diabetic student stripped everything off but his insulin pouch, which he carried around throughout the night.

“With this whole 20-something party culture, getting dressed to go out is such a big deal,” says Kate Horning, a senior who went to the party. “But that whole part of the evening is purposely absent. My friends who didn’t go were like, ‘Oh, my God, were people just staring at each other’s bodies all night?’ And I said, ‘No, people were just kind of chatting and playing pool and playing piano.’ ”

It's nice to know that nothing's changed since more than a decade ago. Those crazy kids.

I must say, I learned a lot about myself, social norms, and my friends that day. Perhaps too much. But ain't that why we go to college?

I would advocate the throwing of a similar party here in Korea – and who knows, maybe some crazy college kids here already have, although I seriously doubt it – but you know if any foreigners were involved, it'd be front-page news and a guaranteed media circus at your deportation proceedings.

Korea ain't ready for the love, baby. Now these are real parties. Foam, stoplight, and heaven/hell parties? Wish we could throw them in Korea, but I like my jobs and not being in the newspaper.

I'm so glad I went to school in the States.

God bless them crazy kids.