As part of my effort to post a bit more often and diversify my blog's content, I'm gonna do more stuff I've wanted to do, but always consider back burner stuff. But I love movie theaters, obsess over screen and sound quality, and have a lifelong obsession with home theater, starting with me syncing up one track from the soundtrack of Star Trek III: The Search for Spock on my mom's record player to the picture on the screen. Getting the music track into stereo, while the voice came out of the television screen (center speaker, baby!) was a pretty neat little trick, I thought.
My brother and family thought I was crazy. And yes, I was a dork. (Was?) But my friends never complain on movie nights. And I do notice a lot of details when it comes to the moviegoing experience, and now that Korea has come such a long way (it really has) in theater technology, I present my obsession to you, in a form of news you might be able to use.
OK. Before those who point out my alleged negativity – since this is going to be a rip of a review on the Artreon theater in Shinchon – let me just say that there are a lot of theaters I like in Korea, and my personal favorite for a lot of quirky reasons is the Land Cinema at Yongsan. But I want to save the good ones for later.
As for the Artreon, however – yo, this theater sucks rizzocks.
I saw Shrek 3 there recently, and it was the worst movie experience I've had in Korea since watching movies in the 1990's in Cheju Island, before they had assigned seats, and when they took more people than they had chairs (some big blockbusters were standing-room-only, and I saw many a movie standing up!).
Cinema One, which is poorly marked and down on B2 two floors below, was simply put, horrid. Light levels for the screen were weak, as they are in most of the analog screens there, since lazy and cheap theaters that want to scrimp on money will wait until the last possible moment to change the bulbs in the projectors, even if they go below acceptable light levels towards the end of their lives.
Then there was the heat. They was simply skimpin', and skimpin' hard. Cinema One is a big theater, actually, and there were lots of people there. They wouldn't run the air conditioners continually, and it got noticeably hot in there, to the point where I actually saw people squirming a bit and pulling out their theater bills and other pieces of paper and fanning themselves.
Remember when hand fans were as common as cellphones are today? When you'd go to a public venue and see the wig-wag of dozens or even hundreds of people fanning themselves? Well, that day brought back memories, and I think the rest of the audience was a little annoyed at being forced to go down memory lane.
And it wasn't just that the AC units broke or something; they would come on just at the point when you noticed it and were starting to get irritated and starting to sweat, then get switched off just before it got to comfortable again.
Truly distracting, and in a way, ruined the movie experience, because it breaks you out of the film, detracts from the film's ability to enthrall you into a state of verisimilitude. In short, I wanted to get out of the theater as soon as possible, as my companion did, and we were busy waiting for the film to end, more than interested in the film itself. And while the third Shrek installment ain't no masterpiece, it's not half bad, either.
As for the other screens in the Artreon, I remember on three distinct occasions seeing films in the various upper levels in which the picture was noticeably out-of-focus. I'm a theater stickler, but I'm still pretty normal and enjoy most films here without thinking about them, and have only complained to managers maybe twice in my life about anything; yet, the several times when I was tempted to do it in relation to my movie-going experience in Korea were almost all at the Artreon.
And just to give you a sense of how bad it once was, the generally pretty tolerant Korean audiences were even bristling when I saw Man on Fire a while back, since it was as if someone had fallen asleep in the projection room and accidentally hit the wrong button on the way down; I actually got up and told them to fix the focus, which caused the teenager much confusion as to what I was doing talking to her, what I could possibly be complaining about, and hey, wasn't I a foreigner?
Since, as a photographer and a pretty decent Korean speaker, I know the words for "focus" and things, I think I was explaining myself pretty clearly; I think it was more of a case of "I'm 18 and this wasn't in my job description." I think she went to tell someone, since they started fiddling with the focus controls, much to the audible relief of the audience; but in the end, it wasn't much better than at the beginning. I think the fact that they tried (but failed) was enough for the audience, since at least they noticed. I think there's something wrong with that projector.
I did see something there in the upper levels recently, and I did remember thinking that the picture looked very soft; not out-of-focus, but it wasn't sharp, either.
I'd avoid Artreon if you have the choice. I think other Korean moviegoers are, as well, actually. Usually, when the new Megabox Shinchon is sold out all day, you can still get a ticket for a showing at the Artreon. Which, come to think of it, is why I keep ending up there from time to time. Note to self: plan farther ahead.
I like doing these reviews, and will do several good ones; until then, I'll give you a rundown of the theaters that you shouldn't have any problems with:
- Any Megabox is a good bet (they're actually Loew's Theaters, from the States, even down to the logo and opening graphics, which is why I guess they keep things up more). Their shit is together.
- CGV is also a good bet, especially in Yongsan. Their digital projectors (not all of the theaters are digital, you should know, and I'll make a point to ask again) fucking rock, and when I saw Superman in digital Imax in 3D, I thought I was flying. Their shit is majorly together.
- Land Cinema, which was never called "Megabox" but shares both decor and equipment with theaters of that name, has always been a nice, hidden place. Nothing super special about their analog projectors, but their sound is always decent and you've actually got something to do if you're into electronics or playing pool, or whatever. When they have events, they often come up with fun, creative activities related to them, or sometimes randomly have things like board games and other random stuff available to while away the time. I just like the Land.
More later, and I hope this might be marginally useful when you're out there planning to see that next new blockbuster.
