I haven't written a spoof piece in a long time, but this utterly stupid and eminently arrogant article (which you should read BEFORE reading further) in the Korea Herald is beyond the realm of criticism. It's almost like a parody of itself, except that it isn't. Check out the debate going on about it at The Marmot's Hole, where I first ran across this story.
Here's my adaptation, with minimal changes besides the ridiculously specific nature of my identity and the language involved. "1.7-generation Korean-American" – Now that's most of the joke right there.
"What Are Appropriate Questions?"
By Shakifa Kim
Since coming to South Korea in July of 1994 to work as an English teacher through the Fulbright English Teaching Assistantship on Cheju Island, I often had to deal with the following questions from teachers and students: Do you eat chitterlings (eb. "chit'lins)? Can you speak ebonics? Have you tried this food and that food and so on.
Such endless and redundant questions have made me think how unknowledgeable people are about Korean-Americans, part-percentage Korean-African-Americans, overseas Koreans (gyopo) and the Korean/African diaspora as a whole and how much of a long way we have to go to bridge this gap of understanding.
Therefore, with the intention to bridge the gap, I would like to respond through this writing to the questions I often encounter, reflecting on my personal experiences as a 0.4 generation Korean-American. (I was born in the U.S. to a black father and Korean mother, but since my blackness does not extend past my waist and seems to have only partially included my penis, and the majority of my body fat is in my belly, I can't exactly say I'm "half-Korean" and will err on the side of a lesser fraction of Korean genetic material.)
Through my responses, I hope to help bring about such redundant, naive and perhaps, inappropriate questions to those that are more reasonable, sensible and respectful.
Let me start with the all too familiar question: Do you speak ebonics? I personally find this question annoying. Yes, I understand that many people often assume that 0.4-percentage Korean-African-Americans can't speak ebonics because of the fact that I have only a taint of black in my blood and would seem to only possess a rudimentary knowledge of ebonics.
So I guess it would only be inevitable that such a question is asked to 0.4-percentage Korean-African-Americans. It's also unfortunate that because of this, I'm too often generalized and stereotyped as someone who had no exposure to ebonical language and can't speak it.
Moreover, this generalization is aggravated by the fact that I'm a native English speaker and therefore, we must all be English-speaking monolinguals.
I have too often let this go over my head, thereby letting people get away with their generalization. But I reached a point where I felt that it was time for me to stand up, speak the truth and embrace my ebonical-self rather than try to fit into this black and white mold where you have to be either Korean, a smart-looking American white guy, or black.
So when ``Do you speak ebonics?'' was asked, I answered ``Yes'' and if further questions were asked, which is always the case, I gladly answered even if it required a lengthy explanation.
Since my main concern was to help them to dispel their stereotypes about 0.4-percentage Korean-African-Americans, I didn't hesitate to fire back with a vengeance in ebonics when assumptions were made.
At last, after two years of struggling with this beast, I have gained the confidence and courage to stand up, speak the truth and not be pigeonholed into this box that has no place for people like me. Therefore, I have taken many people by surprise.
The fact of the matter is, most 0.4-generation Korean-African-Americanss who belong in the 0.6 or lower category, do speak ebonics and many of them, for the most part, grew up speaking ebonics with their parents.
I grew up in an ebonics-speaking home so I'm no exception. So why is this so surprising to people? Isn't this common knowledge?
What's even worse is that I've encountered some Koreans who thought that I learned to speak ebonics while in Korea, not before coming to Korea. Of course, I find this completely absurd.
Not only are they discrediting the efforts of many 0.4-percentage Korean-African-Americans in America, who have spread the ebonical language and culture in America, they are also disrespecting my parents, both ebonics speakers from historically black establishments all across Ohio, as well as my ancestors, some of whom have their roots that go all the way back to Africa and stuff, yo.
One of my co-teachers even went on to tell me how lucky I am to have the opportunity to immerse myself in Korean culture and language because the majority of Korean students don't have the opportunity to immerse themselves in English culture and language. Therefore, I should be more understanding of Korean students as a non-ebonics speaker.
How dare she compare my situation to the Korean students! Did these students have to speak English to communicate with their parents like I had to speak ebonics to communicate with my parents growing up? I remember being utterly offended by her statement.
A similar response can be said of questions dealing with food such as ``Do you like chitt'lins?'' ``Have you tried dirty rice?'' etc. I had a black parent and therefore, I only grew up eating black food at home. My mother cooked nothing other than black food. The refrigerator at my home was always stocked with grits, okra, and lawwwwwd knows how many collard greens.
So to answer your question once more, yes indeed, I've tried chitt'lins. I can eat biscuits and gravy. I know how to use Tabasco sauce.
So may I ask all of you once more to please ask something more reasonable, appropriate and meaningful next time you meet a 0.4-percentage Korean-African-American? There's so much more to ask other than the same, mundane and outdated questions such as the ones I mentioned above.
And as they say in ebonics, "Ya'll betta recognize, boooieee! Word up to ya mutha, yo!"
The writer is currently freelancing as a teacher and journalist in Seoul. She can be contacted at mr_0.4_percentage_Korean_African_American_living_in_korea_so_you_betta_memorize_my_email_address_it'[email protected].
